{"href":"https://api.simplecast.com/oembed?url=https%3A%2F%2Fplay-for-a-change.simplecast.com%2Fepisodes%2Fepisode-9-the-freedom-frog-2DlL_zrC","width":444,"version":"1.0","type":"rich","title":"Episode #9 The Freedom Frog","thumbnail_width":300,"thumbnail_url":"https://image.simplecastcdn.com/images/19c714a2-1d97-4f9b-97d4-85f740d985a6/14f1e81e-9ba1-4dd2-b549-92c3edf097a5/come-out-and-play-for-a-change-9.jpg","thumbnail_height":300,"provider_url":"https://simplecast.com","provider_name":"Simplecast","html":"","height":200,"description":"Today on the playground I want to share the second piece of the 4 part The Patient Lens Series in Play For A Change called The Freedom Frog…\n\nThis is one of the parts of major depression and anxiety that I think is hard for some people to imagine. I am not trying to be mean, and I am not a heartless person, most of the time I am not anti-social.\n\nHowever, there is a threshold for certain life elements that is very low for me right now, \nI can see that I am not being kind or caring, it’s like being able to see yourself from the outside…looking down at yourself and it is full of judgement…\nA good person would have….\nUsually you would…\nA good mom, teacher, friend does this and the popper response is …this…\n\nBut I am empty… and covering the emptiness is what gets me to this level of my illness…\nWhen you gift wrap your life so no one can see what’s under the wrapping its exhausting…\nAnd after doing that for many years of my life the gift wrap is made of Teflon and adorned with steel bows… but it pretty to look at :)\n\nBut there is a point like in any chronic illness that you don’t have the energy to tie pretty bows and make the wrapping look right…\n\nIt doesn’t have to be perfect, I am not perfect, but I am worthy of more than I expected and somewhere inside I actually feel that…and I will work on believing it…\nLets continue the conversation… the story matters… the story build bridges…\n\nShare it, or hold it…but know you are not alone… we survive by finding an ounce of play and then adding it back slowly into our space.\n"}